April 06, 2010


(disclaimer: i'm pretty sure i've used "changes" as a subject previously. no originality!)
Life evolves. Sometimes memories carry over, experiences, emotion from previous chapters. Other times it's best to release them, crush them into feathered dust and shed them from the palm. I'd planned tentatively to ditch this website, run from it and not look back. I'd anticipated that the pain of maintaining this site over so many years would be devastating beyond imagination and that I'd rather bury it all beneath the tunnels of New York City. But a few things have happened to remind me that I exist, too. I, too, deserve memories, love, peaceful sleep, stunning dreams (there's a whole "astral travel" thing I've not yet fully explored yet believe I've experienced!), someone to cook for me, someplace that feels like home more than any home has ever felt like home? So, instead of bailing on Elements, I'm going to keep its legacy alive. I will explore the past, perhaps not soon, but maybe once I've recovered from a whole bunch of months (also years) worth of gaping wounds constantly burned with salt. I'm encountering demons I previously refused to acknowledge. I'm hosting them, but (sshh!) suffocating them slowly while they inhabit my heart. KB won't let these demons beat her. Lots more to come.*Above, Gramercy Park is the most incredible neighborhood. Oh. I couldn't ask for a better place to call home. Oh!