Damages

Queens Sky as Seen from 409 on 69th Ave

Weekend Flowers for 409 69th Ave

I aim to post more often, as I used to. My heart is singing and crying and cursing and shouting every single day, and this space used to be my forum for splatting everything to the proverbial pavement. I'm going to revisit this now in order to empty my brain.

I am crying and I'm not sure why. Not, you know, this second...just in general. Yesterday I cried a whole bunch, and I was like, with wet eyes, what the goddamn fuck? I haven't menstruated since March of this year, and am not pregnant (I don't think anyway) (that would be a plot twist!) so I have basically blamed all ill-all on the fucking thyroid, as previously mentioned, you piece of meanness organ you.

My Mom thinks that despite not menstruating, it is possible I could be experiencing menstrual stuff. Well, fine, and fair enough. But bleed already. My uterus and all of that reproductive organ nonsense health check came back thumbs up but where the heck is my period? 

Anyway.

Back to being in love, because that is the item of my life that is of most significance.

I'm going to start with this:

I asked him saddest song. And he replied immediately, because Rob has focused thoughts, he is not loose and free (I mean, he is)...he knows things.

So he said, "Putting the Damage On."

Sadly, I'm afraid this song relates to her. 

And while I'm falling for him like a teenager, walking the halls and making eye contact, exchanging handwritten notes....he has work to do. I'm otherwise going to be on the move.

I'm madly in love but I'm worth a lot, too.