Pillows

I feel like my life is about to take a turn. I don't know *what kind of turn* but some kind of one.

Greg comes here in less than 48 hours. I'm terrified about this. He rented a car; he will be driving to my home base Sunday morning. He will be standing in my midst. His eyes will be just as copper as ever, and he will stare right into my soul as he does. And his hands may grasp mine (or maybe not?) And we will embrace as if we're good friends, or we will embrace as if we are long lost lovers. I'm not sure which (and that scares me.)

I will want to touch his cheek, that sweet part of his face that is so completely cute when he likes something, when he smiles. Maybe I will, or maybe we will be distant. I don't know yet. I do know that he wants to stay with me, which is a great thing. He is part of my home, always.

I'm already in disbelief that he will be on a plane to LA in so few hours, and that he will be landing at LAX and texting me that he is here, and that he will grab his rental car, and that he will drive to Los Feliz, and that he will park that car and will find me and that we will find each other again.

(WHAT HAPPENS WHEN PEOPLE FIND EACH OTHER AGAIN.)

I'm nervous.

He wants to ask me many things that I do not want to answer. He wants to *help* me. He wants to take care of this small soul. He is so meaningful. He means everything he says.

I am *filled with butterflies* to see him. They are fluttering like a storm in my belly. They're colorful, beautiful, wonderful, magical. Painful, though.